Cunningness.net may seem very serious. And yes, of course we are, but we’re also kind of playful. After all, Cunningness.net more or less consists of almost 30-year-old children.

Being children we enjoy pranks, and being almost 30 years old the typical place for pranks is then the office. In other words, we enjoy office pranks. We’ve done quite a few, but only documented two of them. These two are however available to you, our beloved readers. The first one is The Switch, where we switched Henrik’s and Benny’s offices, creating exact replicas but in the other person’s room. The second one, Superman, was when we thought that Maria’s office wasn’t as cosy as it could be.

These are now available to you, not only in this post but also in the left sidebar. Enjoy!

The fundraising went so and so. Cold calling people about donating towards the launch of the Cunningness satellite isn’t exactly easy. The only real donation we received was when Christian tried the more well-tested approach of begging at a street corner. One man, who probably didn’t read the sign, threw him a coin. The fund-raising is now officially abandoned.

Satellite project fundraising results

Despite this setback, none at Cunningness HQ has given up hope in launching our very own satellite. The importance of this project is just too big to let economic factors stop us from completing it. In hindsight, the goal of raising 980000 euros to launch it using a rocket might have been somewhat too ambitious. However, the scientists at Cunningness HQ are now working hard on alternative ways of launching the satellite.

While googling on the subject, our main scientist found a very interesting way of launching satellites. It seems that the US Air Force are working on using magnets to accelerate a satellite to enough velocity to be able to launch it into space. So far they haven’t been able to do this, but the scientists here at Cunningness HQ have since been working on their own magnetic-powered launch system. So far, only lab tests have been performed (one shown below), but they are getting very close to be able to perform a first real test launch.

Experiments conducted by Cunningness HQ scientists

The actual launch site is yet to be decided. It’s right now down to two options: either S:t Hans backar in Lund, Sweden, or Mount Kumotori in Tokyo, Japan. Both sites are close to Cunningness national HQs, which will be very convenient during lunch and coffee breaks.

If you do have any railway tracks lying around, not being used, or for that matter any old fridge magnets that you could spare, please let us know. These are critical components of this new hi-tech launch scheme.

277 days. That’s how long Cunningness.net has been providing the world with it’s services, but it’s also how long the marketing department, together with linguistic experts, has discussed the grammatics surrounding the words cunning, cunningness, etc. It’s a fact that Cunningness.net is ahead of it’s time, considering that the English language is not up to date. One example is the plural form of cunningness, which some people don’t even seem to accept as a valid state of this world.

It’s of course true that it was very uncommon, if not unheard of, that more than one cunningness existed before, but with Cunningness.net that has all changed. The world can definitely handle multiple entities of cunningness. How could otherwise Cunningness.net provide one every 10 second? Cunningness.net is filling the void that previously existed, and of course this needs to be reflected in the languages around the world.

In any case, the marketing department of Cunningness.net has now after 277 days of very deliberate thoughts decided on the plural form of cunningness. It’s simple, easy to remember, and fits with the cunning feature of the English language called unmarked plural. The correct grammar is then: one cunningness, many cunningness.

Note: One member of the marketing department noted that this makes it much easier to create slogans containing the word cunningness, since the singular and plural forms will rhyme.

Update: The English language has taken a step towards the future! It has been decided to remove the parameter “uncountable” from cunningness. The full English definition of cunningness (including plural handling and a revisited definition of the term itself) can be found here. This can only be seen as a victory for our marketing department. /C

Today Cunningness HQ is celebrating!  You may ask why, as the lack of news on the previously mentioned space project could indicate some setback in that area. That may very well be true, but we still have things to celebrate as Cunningness today reached an important milestone.

As of today, Cunningness has generated a total of 10,000 cunningnesses! (The correct spelling of cunningness in plural form is still under discussion within the marketing organization)

Imagine the feeling of reading only one single piece of cunningness. It’s a feeling of warmth mixed with a cunning feeling. Now imagine that times 10,000. That’s one cunning feeling! That’s the total cunningness we’ve spread around the world so far, and we’re committed to continuing with this, around the globe, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

…recent scientific results shows that chicken (with curry) lasts longer than expected in a fridge. Over two weeks that is.

Mitigation… escalation… these are just words.

 But was is truely true is that if Internet one day would close down we at Cunningness.net would, yet again, be your beacon of light in the trembling darkness. This would not be a task that one would take lightly upon and that is why we have decided to build our own communication network - a sort of Internet replacement, ready on that dreadful day.

Now, to do this we need more than mere wires and computers. Thus, during todays board meeting at cunningness.net world HQ, the board decided to start investing in our own satellite.

There are several producers of such devices, but when comparing them a particular one has stood their ground when we faced them with the gruesome reality of the Cunningness.net quality assurance team. The space division at Cunningness.net is aiming to be able to provide a truly global cunning experience before Q4 2010.

… if you would be willing to partake in this adventure and if you happen to have 980kEuro around, just contact us.

 c

There are some things you cannot live without. Since one of them is Cunningness.net, we have made sure that you can stay on top of things all the time, where ever you are!

Check out our twitter account. Cunningness.net is devoted to leading by example, so why not join as a follower?

/Christian & Karl, making your life a better thing

Update: At certain times of the day, which are chosen with some deliberation after a lot of cunning thoughts, the cunningness twitter account™ will be updated with a not-so-predefined cunningness. /K

DNA is pretty cunning. I’d even dare to say that it would most likely grab one of the top three positions, were the features of this world ordered by their individual sense of cunningness. So what could be more interesting than your own DNA? Any way you look at it, it’s the most relevant piece of data in your life.

23andMe officially launched today, allowing anyone with an extra $999 to get a saliva sample, send it 23andMe’s way for analysis and then see all kind of information about their own genetic makeup.

Cunning, cunning indeed…

Anyone read it?